Mixed Thoughts
by DurielZamoran
Summary: Collection of usually Naru-centric drabbles and one-shots. Genres and themes vary, as may pairings.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: I have decided to create a sort of dumping ground for all my incessant drabble and one-shots. That way I feel special because it gets more attention. Seriously, you write a one-shot put it up, and then after an initial few reviews, it slips between the cracks and dies.

Some of these will be in FFTRIN-verse (Forty Five Tails Rolled Into Nine), others won't be, and some will just be plain random. Nonetheless, begin the weird and creepy one-shots!


	2. Narcissus

A/N: If you squint hard enough, this could be considered a KyuNaru ficlet. A Male!KyuNaru ficlet. Just a warning. I myself don't really consider it one, as I consider Kyuubi genderless.

Nonetheless, this is a story, and so it can be whatever you imagine. Even Yuri.

* * *

Pain wracked his mind, the crimson liquid dripping down his arm, forming a pool on the stained tiles that constituted his floor. It was a ritual. Something he did every year. Every time, he would take a knife, and shove it into his flesh, carving the same thing over and over. He would carve the Kanji for love into his arm again and again.

Love was something he could never have. Nobody would ever truly love him. His own kin, the Jinchuuriki understood his pain like nobody else could, but yet, were incapable of truly loving. They had all been stunted. Unable to love, as nobody had taught them how… if someone had taken the time to love them, then they could learn, but nobody would. Who would teach them, demon scum, how to love…? After all, they were heartless. They weren't human after all.

But just like his kin, he yearned for it. He wanted, desired, _needed_ to be loved. He had to be loved… so he could love something in return. Love had come to him, from the most unlikely source.

The demon that resided within him had offered to love him. Being a demon, it was genderless, and so capable of assuming either one. At that point and time, Naruto could care less whether the person who loved him was male, or female. It wasn't like he had the choice of being picky. The Kyuubi assumed a human form, and had wrapped its arms around his somewhat smaller form, holding him close, whispering in his ear. It reassured him that he would never be alone again, that they could be together forever, and that nobody could break them apart. Naruto had wrapped his own arms around the Kyuubi's form and held it tight, resting his head against the youkai's chest.

Every year now, he would carve the kanji into his arm, as a sign of the everlasting pact between him, and his demon.

Naruto nearly laughed. Love was always so romanticized, made out to be the epitome of pleasure. As if people could fall in love and nothing could break them apart… as if true love actually existed, and that people were 'meant' for each other. The Kyuubi was a part of him, and so nobody could really love him except himself.

It was narcissistic of him, to love himself. But then again, he truly, physically loved himself. Nobody else could really claim they could hold themselves at night, that they could share a kiss with themselves. It made Naruto feel unique and proud. It felt weird, hugging what was essentially a Kage Bunshin with an altered form and different conscious, but Naruto didn't mind. Nobody else would love him.


	3. Fallen

A\N: Well, I had no idea where I was really taking this oneshot. And, before you ask, no bonus points for figuring out who's the main star.

* * *

Cold steel slipped through flesh, as light danced from blade, into the eyes of those who had fallen into the hands of death.

_When had it come to this…?_

Screams rang through the night, as rivulets of crimson water flowed from those who had no future, as the stealer of dreams stalked through the village.

_When did I fall…?_

They formed lines, made handseals and threw jutsu. They stared in shock as the liquid life sprayed from wounds, into the air, staining the sky a blood red.

_When had it all collapsed…?_

His eyes were filled with emotion. Hurt, sorrow… disappointment. "Why…? You could've been so much more…!" He fell, like all the others, his eyes filled with tears. Crimson tears, formed rivers from the corners of his eyes as he slowly faded from life.

_How could this happen…?_

Pale white eyes held nothing but contempt… and disappointment. Rage bubbled up at those _infuriating_ eyes! His palms struck out, chakra lancing from the centre of his hands. He had stared in horror, as chakra claws tore through his arms, slashing through his skull.

_How _did_ this happen…?_

Mismatched red and grey held nothing but that blasted emotion. Claws of blood red ripped into flesh, desperate to rid themselves of those eyes. But they were haunting. Engraved in his mind, refusing to go away.

"_How could you do this to us…?"_

Another wave of chakra, and those that stood in confidence, were nothing but a bloody mess. People ran and fled, screaming in panicked terror as nothing would stop the Juggernaut of Death.

"_I'm so disappointed in you…"_

The blonde-busty woman stood there, eyes sad, and hollow. No chance to speak before a claw of chakra tore her in half. But her eyes did the talking, and another claw shredded them. But nothing would make those eyes go away, and as each of them died, their eyes joined the others in haunting him.

"_How could you do this to all of us…?"_

Five faces stared down upon the now-burning village, like gods staring upon their followers. One single, massive claw of chakra tore through the mountain faces, disfiguring the Five Faces. Gods they were not, for what god could let a child slip so far into madness...?


	4. Flinch When You See Me

A\N: To those who read 45 Tails, sorry for the wait, but no update in sight.

* * *

I stare at the mirror in front of me, making faces, and mimicking expression's I've seen other people use. My face twists into a frown Ojii-san uses whenever he mentions the villagers and me in the same breath. It doesn't look very right on me, so I let my face slacken.

A memory of people grinning when they were happy rises to the forefront of my mind, so I attempt to twist my face into grin. It takes me a few tries, but I managed to get something that seems right. I decide to grin more, because Ojii-san gets sad when I'm sad, and if I'm grinning, then Ojii-san won't think I'm sad. I don't want Ojii-san to feel sad.

My face contorts into an awkward smile. Bleh. Nobody would consider _that_ a smile, so much of it as a monstrosity. I decide I don't like my smiles. My eyes seem so bleak and empty, when I smile. At least when I'm grinning big enough, my eyes will be too squinty for anyone to see.

I wish I could smile, like a real person, that I could feel joy, and happiness. Kyuubi-san says I can't feel emotions, because I'm a Jinchuuriki, whatever that is. He says the best I can do is act, so that everyone around won't feel sad. Feeling sad is bad, or so Kyuubi-san says.

So, I put on my shirt and sandals, and bound out the door, because today is the start of the Academy. I'm going to become a ninja, so Ojii-san can be proud of me. I'm going to be Hokage, because Ojii-san is much too old now. I don't want Ojii-san to work so hard when he's old. Kyuubi-san says that's it's bad for him to do so, and says I should help find a replacement at least. But I don't know if Ojii-san can trust anyone else with the village, except for me. I know he'd trust me. Ojii-san said he does.

He wouldn't lie to me. Kyuubi-san says when Ojii-san flinches, it means he's telling the truth.


End file.
